Finding my voice

Something I've always struggled with is telling people no.  For whatever reason I roll myself out like a welcome mat for people to come and go across as they please.  There are people who don't take advantage of that, of course, but many who do.  In that same way, I find difficulty in telling people when they are upsetting me, offending me, or are generally out of line.  Since being pregnant, this is an even bigger problem.  Why you ask?  Because everyone has an opinion that you MUST know.

I can't even begin to express how obnoxious it is to constantly have everyone telling me what I should/shouldn't be doing, how I should/shouldn't be doing it, and why I'm wrong.  It doesn't matter that I discuss things with my OB, because apparently once the second line appears on that pregnancy test, everyone you know becomes an expert.  Now don't get me wrong, I'm sure there are many valuable things I can learn from people who have been there and done that, but (BUT) that doesn't mean I need to be told what do to all of the time.  The thing is, I DON'T CARE what you, your sister, your friend did while they were pregnant.  That is not my life, my child, my pregnancy.  The only opinions that really matter to me are mine, my husband's, my OB's, and/or any other professional that can give me insight.

In that same way, everyone who is pregnant at the same time with you wants to be pregnancy buddies.  They want to compare what's going on with them and what's going on with you...even if it's totally normal for things to be different.  Just like opinions, I don't WANT a pregnancy buddy.  I already have a pregnancy buddy - s/he is growing up a storm and sucking all of my energy.  We're good.  We don't want you to compare yourself to us friends.  I don't understand why this is a foreign concept.  I don't want you to touch my belly (uhh, hello, you're not going to feel anything), to tell me I'm looking bigger (well, you look like a whale yourself), to explain to me what's going on with my body since this isn't your first time (yeah, I can read WTE too), or anything else for that matter.  We're pregnant together at the same time.  Pure coincidence, and not something I ever in a million years would have planned.  So here's my excitement.  You ready for it?  Really ready?  Whoopie.  That's the best you're going to get out of me.

Now mix all of that with the boatload of hormones I'm dealing with and you'll see my dilemma.  Some days I want to break out into a complete sobbing mess.  Bring on the tissues because the flood gates are opening.  Others days I'm literally thinking of the best way to hide the body from the cops (oh, I've thought of a few good ones).  Seriously, I'm going to sell my tips to gangsters for extra money on maternity leave.  Most days, though, I'm dreading my next interaction with someone who is going to start with me.  I really need to find the best way to tell people that I don't give a crap about what they have to say, and my quota of pregnancy buddies is full.  Thankyouverymuch.

Once that happens I'll write a book and be rich forever.  Until then, I may very well be plotting your death.